Next time, skip the tantrum.

A few years ago I was in charge of the decorations for a seminary graduation dinner/dance for the youth at church.  I felt that it was serendipity when  I found yards and yards of cream colored fabric at a factory for practically nothing.   I embarked on a huge sewing project, tablecloths, swags, you know, the usual insanity that women have a way of getting themselves into.  I prayed that I would be able to do the sewing with acceptable results and that my sewing machine would function properly.  Well, a couple of tablecloths into the project something happened with my sewing machine. It was jamming and sticking and not cooperating at all..  I felt a similar tantrum welling up in my own brain.  At that moment the phone rang. I didn't really have time to answer it but found myself ranting to my friend about how my machine wasn't working and I was doing this big project for church and how was I supposed to finish.? blah and blah.  I don't remember why she thought she called, but I know why she called.  She calmly explained how to fix my machine.  Of course it worked and I was on my way.  To me this was nothing short of a miracle, but I remember thinking, "Next time I'm going to skip the tantrum."

A few (probably many, but everything seems like a few these days) years ago I heard this quote and really wanted it to be true.

After my 52 years  I can honestly say it is true.  There are the dumb things that I knew were dumb that I chose to do.  They didn't work out as well, unless you count learning that they were as dumb or dumber than I thought.  But everything else, including being dumb because I'm human, has worked out.  And that's why I really can skip the tantrum and the freaking out and the fear and stress.

Like that time I wanted to buy a used baby crib for my second child who would be born before my first child was out of his crib.  I was at a yard sale and saw just what I wanted .  I was waiting to talk to the owner while he was having a conversation with someone else.  Then this other person just went right in front of me and yelled, "I want that crib!"  I was overcome with indignation over the unfairness of  it all. I mean, I was so deserving, being a poor college student just trying to give my baby a place to sleep.  The nerve of some people!  But guess what, the next week I found an even newer crib for less money.  So the aggressive lady got what she wanted and the poor student's wife got what she wanted and it all worked out.  It would have been just so much more attractive if the poor student's wife would have not pouted and stomped her feet when things didn't go exactly the way she wanted.

Even schedules have a way of working out.  I really can stop making everyone around me miserable when I think they're making me late even though they're trying.  How many times have I not made it to a planned destination only to find out the other person had to cancel?  More than once I have yelled at the kids, sped in the car to an appointment to be greeted with a polite explanation that the other party was running a tad late and they were sorry.

  Just this summer we had a complex and synchronized schedule that enabled Paul to go scout camp with Gabe, and Rebecca and I to pack and prepare for a trip to a family reunion in Houston.  I felt that it was critical that we arrive on Friday morning because everyone else was arriving Thurs. night and I couldn't miss a bit of the official fun with family .  Paul and Gabe had to leave scout camp early to make this goal of a Thurs. morning departure.  Initially Paul was enthusiastic about leaving scout camp early, but on Thurs. morning he texted me, "Won't be home till afternoon. Gabe needs to finish his rifle merit badge."  Okay, I could see that he was making an unselfish decision and trying to help Gabe and scouting is important, but AN AFTERNOON DEPARTURE IS UNACCEPTABLE!  ANSWER YOUR PHONE!  Of course he didn't answer his phone, he was in class in the wilderness.  I kept my tantrum a secret in my mind and as promised, he and Gabe returned home after lunch and we headed off.  Gabe had a great experience and gained a lot of confidence by passing off the challenging requirements.  I was resolved that the delay was worth my sacrifice, but guess what?  I didn't even have to sacrifice.  When we arrived at the beach house at 1:00 everyone was outside because they couldn't even get in until 1:30. They had just barely arrived and set out lunch.

See?  Everything will work out so really, next time I'm going to skip the tantrum.